A little girl walks hand in hand with her Father on a dark and broken path. Not knowing where she is going, she simply trusts Him. As the path gets rougher, she stumbles. She is frustrated,but she holds tighter to her Father’s hand. As they continue walking, she trips, slips and stumbles over and over. Until finally, she falls.
Overwhelmed with her failure and the pain of her impact with the ground, she begins to cry. Cuts and bruises appear on her arms and legs, and as she starts to bleed she starts to lose hope of ever making it anywhere.
Her Father bends down. He wipes her tears, dusts her off and stands her to her feet.
And they begin to walk again. Unsure of how far she will make it, and confident in the possibility that she will fall again, the little girl holds tightly to her Father’s hand. And she does fall.
Over
and over
and over
and over.
But He is faithful to pick her up.
Over
and over
and over
and over.
He did not teach His daughter to walk that she might leave Him and walk on her own. But that she would walk with Him. Into rough places. Into dangerous places. Into dark places. Into His heart. To know His love. To know the freedom she has to keep getting back up.
Over
and over
and over
and over.
I have set the Lord always before me. Because He is at my right hand, I will not be shaken. Therefore my heart is glad and my tongue rejoices; my body also will rest secure, because you will not abandon me to the grave, nor will you let your Holy One see decay. You have made known to me the path of life; you will fill me with the joy in your presence, with eternal pleasures at your right hand. - Psalm 16:8-11
God is within her, she will not fall; God will help her at break of day. - Psalm 46:5
Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint. - Isaiah 40:30-31
For you, O Lord, have delivered my soul from death, my eyes from tears, my feet from stumbling, that I may walk before the Lord in the land of the living. - Psalm 116:8-9
After an exhausting, but amazing week on tour with The Hundred Movement (www.thehundredmovement.com; thehundredmovement.tumblr.com), and a long few days back at school, I came home today and just wanted to be alone with God. So, I shut my door, sat on my bed, let out a huge breath and waited for Him to start to speak to my heart about the whirlwind of a week and a half I had just experienced.
Nothing.
The Lord said, “Go out and stand on the mountain in the presence of the Lord, for the Lord is about to pass by.”
Then a great and powerful wind tore the mountains apart and shattered the rocks before the Lord, but the Lord was not in the wind. After the wind there was an earthquake, but the Lord was not in the earthquake. After the earthquake came a fire, but the Lord was not in the fire. And after the fire came a gentle whisper.
- I Kings 19:11-13
As I waited for His voice, all of a sudden, it started to POUR down rain and hail. And something changed. In the storm, I didn’t hear His voice. But I felt His presence. And as the rain continued to come down harder and harder, I started to become more aware of the power of His spirit.
And then it stopped.
And in the stillness, in the quiet that always comes after a storm, He whispered:
“Sometimes I just want you to know that I’m HERE. Not to hear Me in the storm, but to feel Me in it. Then, you will trust My voice because you have seen My power, and you will believe what I say because you have felt My strength. And in the stillness, you will know that I am God.”
I think God’s voice speaks the loudest in the early morning. Maybe it’s the peace and hope that fills a heart waiting for the sun to rise. Maybe it’s the stillness of a mind not yet clouded with the stress of the coming hours. Maybe it’s just the calm before the storm of the day.
This morning, early this morning, I got the privilege to pray with 3 of my amazing sisters. After spending our own time alone with Jesus for about an hour and a half, we all came together to share the things He showed us. This is what He told me:
“The schemes of the devil have no chance against the army of the Ones that I love. Victory is rising IN you. Freedom is pouring OUT of you. Love is lifting you up. It’s giving you new eyes. New ears. New hands. New feet. Run in the path I’ve set before you. Set fire to everything around you, and proclaim my Name wherever you go. My flood is coming. My storm is coming. And it’s a good flood. And a good storm. I’m washing away shame. I’m washing away doubt. I’m washing away abuse. I’m washing away insecurity. I’m washing away sin. And in the very first signs of this flood, lies are drowning. I will suffocate the voice that tells my people they are not worthy. They are not loved. They are not valuable. And my love will lift them up above the floodwaters. Up above the clouds. My plans WILL succeed and my purposes WILL stand. Let him who wants to oppose me, come. The floodwaters are waiting for him. I’m flooding hearts. I’m flooding minds. I’m flooding spirits. With my love. With my power. And with my grace. And my anointing falls like the rain. Dance in my anointing. As the armies of your enemy advance, put on love and DANCE in the midst of their attack. Love will be your battle cry. And grace your shield. I’m releasing you to go. Go. Rise up. Walk into the deep darkness and danger that awaits you, and laugh. Shout for joy for the hope that’s coming for the captives. For the light that’s coming to FREE them from the darkness. I AM Love and Light. And I’ve chosen you to bear my Name. To bring my kingdom. To show the world that I AM who I say I AM.”
“Whatever you have in mind, DO IT, for God is with you.”- I Chronicles 11:2
94 days. 94 days until I return to the place where God showed me His beauty in ways I’d never dreamed, and His love in ways I’d never imagined. 94 days until I lay on the shores of the beaches where I heard His voice so clearly, and felt His presence so strongly. 94 days until I walk some of the darkest streets, blinded by the beauty of the strongest Love. 94 days until I look deep into the hopeless eyes of slavery and see freedom rising in the precious hearts of God’s beloved daughters. 94 days until my heart is reunited with the piece of it that was so easily stolen by the beauty of last summer. 94 days until Thai Tea, Pad Thai, tuk tuks and mopeds. 94 days until I go back to Thailand. 94 days.
94 days. 94 days of peaceful mornings with Jesus in my third floor apartment. 94 days of crazy Boone weather. 94 days of coffee dates with the freshmen girls who’ve overtaken my prayers and filled my heart. 94 days of sweet moments with my family and friends. 94 days of papers, projects and books. 94 days of blessings and lessons. 94 days of living passionately where I am. 94 days of excitement and hope for what is to come. 94 days of peace and joy for what I already have. 94 days.
“Is He mighty? He will show Himself strong on the behalf of them that trust Him.
Is He love? Then with lovingkindness will He have mercy on us.
Whatever attributes may compose the character of Deity, every one of them to its fullest extent shall be engaged on our side.
To put everything in one, there is nothing you can want, there is nothing you can ask for, there is nothing you can need in time or in eternity, there is nothing living, nothing dying, there is nothing in this world, nothing in the next world, there is nothing now, nothing at the resurrection-morning, nothing in heaven which is not contained in this text -
I will never leave thee, nor forsake thee.”
” —CH Spurgeon
Over the past few months, I have been discovering the Spirit of God in ways I’ve never known Him before. Or maybe it’s just that I’m finally actually discovering HIM. Not His plans for me. Not His answers to my questions. But HIM. It’s so easy to seek His will, to seek His wisdom, and to seek His guidance.
But we so often forget to seek Him.
To come into His presence desiring to know Him more instead of to know the answers.
To come longing to see His face instead of our future.
To come in eager expectation of all He has for us, instead of in anxiety asking for what we have for ourselves.
To come just to hear His voice.
Just to feel His love.
Just to be away from the world, and with our Savior.
It’s a freeing thing to be unsure of everything, but to be SURE of your God. So if your future is a mystery, and tomorrow is filled with questions,
Good.
Let it all go. And dive into the amazing mystery of who this insanely jealous and incomprehensibly loving God is. And the deeper He takes you into His heart, the farther away from anything you thought your life would be you’ll get.
It’s as if God were saying, “What I am is all that need matter to you, for there lie your hope and your peace. I will do what I will do, and it will all come to light at last, but how I do it is My secret. Trust Me, and be not afraid.” - AW Tozer
Be still, and KNOW that I am God. - Psalm 46:10
“Like the eye which sees everything in front of it and never see itself, faith is occupied with the Object upon which it rests and pays no attention to itself at all. While we are looking at God we do not see ourselves - blessed riddance. The man who has struggled to purify himself and has had nothing but repeated failures will experience real relief when he stops tinkering with his soul and looks away to the perfect One. While he looks at Christ the very things he has so long been trying to do will be getting done within him. It will be God working in him to will and to do.” - AW Tozer
